McSkinny Friday

Thursday official weigh in: 193.5

That's an additional loss of 3.5lbs!

I've got to stop weighing myself at home first, because I'm always disappointed with the doctors scale, which is about 2 full pounds higher than mine. But, official weights it is and 3.5lbs is actually something I'm quite proud of! GO ME!

After two weeks, here are my measurements and the changes:
Acupuncture is still going very well. I feel a bit better after each treatment. I've got less neck/shoulder tension (it isn't cured yet, but it is better!), I haven't had a headache since my last visit, and the circulation (to my hands and feet especially) seems to have improved. In addition to my treatments I am trying to focus more on my posture. Not until I started paying attention to it did I realize how often I am hunched over with my shoulders scrunched up to my ears.

I feel as though I'm in a really good place right now. I've discovered recently that I have a bit of an obsessive personality. Basically, once I get an idea in my head, it is really difficult for me to shake it. All of my thoughts surround it. That becomes very clear to me when I examine our TTC adventures. Not only did we decide to ditch the pill, but I started researching names, doing budgets, researching our health care, looking at nursery designs, and window shopping. Not to mention the blogging, the message board, the temping, charting, ovulation tests, meds, doctors appointments, fertility yoga, vitamins, diet changes, etc, etc, etc. I basically jumped right in the deep end and have now spent over two years drowning in it.

While I don't think I'm cured (hello my constant posts about my diet...), I think my energies have been focused in a more productive direction. Onto something I can control and that is actively improving my life. My diet, managing my stress, improving my job situation, and lastly (my favorite) our trip to Europe. I finally feel like I am living my life again. I have goals and a purpose. Do I still want to start my family? Absolutely. Can I control exactly when and how that happens? No. So instead of stressing myself out in a spiral of unproductiveness, I had to redirect my efforts.

I believe doing so will help me in a two important ways....

1. Dropping weight will do nothing but help me manage my PCOS. Improving my health, self image, confidence, and lastly my ability to conceive.

2. Focusing on aspects of my life I can control helps me manage my stress, to enjoy my life, and to relax. And we all know what 'they' say about relaxing... it certainly can't hurt in the baby making process.

So, in a way, while we're not focusing only on baby making, we're still working towards our goal of conception. Sure it may be a little less of a direct route, but that road wasn't really working out for us anyway, now was it? Part of me knew all along that I wasn't acting in a way that was productive and healthy. While I was in that tornado it was really hard to step away. I suppose I had to wait until the time was right. Until I was ready to focus on me again. On my relationships, my health, and my life.

I'm happy to report that I'm back. A little banged up after that ride, but I'm ready to trudge forward.