Monday, September 27, 2010


You know those days where you don't want to get out of bed? Today was one of those days for me and I cannot shake my glum mood.

I'm upset with the universe and carrying a heavy heart for a friend. A sweet, loving, wonderful friend of mine went into premature labor at 23 weeks and lost her son yesterday. This is the second angel baby for this family. Her daughter passed 8/15/09.

I cannot begin to fathom. To understand. To even comprehend what they are going through right now. My heart physically hurts at the thought of it. Who makes these decisions?! Who decides who gets to stay and go!? I'd like to think it isn't God. That there isn't some devine force out there robbing these beautiful people of their family. The thought sickens me...

The whole situation keeps making me think about our own struggle with IF. What would we do if faced with that situation after trying so long? If this woman, who has suffered more than anyone ever should, has not been given a child - why should I? My heart is pulled in many directions today, none of which are positive.

Let's hope this work day is sufficiently distracting...

1 comment:

  1. My heart goes out to her and her family. I honestly don't understand why those who are so giving and loving lose their children, but those who are abusive get to keep theirs. A lot of stuff in the world makes me question "why?" and "who decides who stays or goes?"

    Sorry you're feeling really blahed out. I really hope things look up, especially for her. Too much pain, sometimes God gives us more then we can handle.. I'm sure of it.