Tuesday, April 5, 2011

So I continue to dig.

For me, losing weight has been like an archaeological dig. The more of my excess weight I shovel away, the more of myself I uncover.

Looking back at old pictures of myself is really hard. It hurts and sometimes it's really embarrassing. Instantly I think of being insecure and my outside being a reflection of the inside. What must people have thought of me? That I was letting myself slip? That I disrespected myself enough to harm my body and health?

I'm ashamed I let it get that far.

I knew that I was overweight, but that 'obese' label never really hit home until now. When they say hindsight is 20/20, they aren't kidding.

I am enjoying finding the new true me, so I will continue to dig.

**I'm sorry that I've been pretty MIA the last week. Life and the new job are keeping me going at 1,000 mph! I'm checking in as often as I'm able. Updates on the accident and life are coming soon. Life happens, right?**


  1. Oh boy, do I know what you mean.

    It's totally an uphill battle with this weightloss thing. But you are doing an amazing job and have been a huge inspiration to me. I am teetering on the 10 lb. ledge and can't seem to step over it.

    It's very discouraging. I am sure you looked just beautiful at every weight. But we all feel most happy and comfortable at different points/weights.

    My confortable/happy weight is about 160, whereas that might feel much too heavy for some. It's a personal thing and you know when you are where you should be.

    Good luck!

  2. I know what you mean... It's like some weeks I feel and look great and then some months I look like crap and feel like crap about it. It is a roller coaster.

    Thank you so much for the bracelet! I am wearing mine proudly and think of all you ladies every day when I look at it!

  3. Your friends saw you as beautiful and amazing. Because that's what you are.
    And that isn't measured by the numbers on a scale.